The other day, a young man demanded, “Define assimilate!” He and others were responding to a Post I’d made on Facebook showing a crowd of Somali’s in Minnesota dominating a shopping mall. I am not an advocate of our current refugee resettlement programs or the majority of our current immigration policies or lack thereof. But his question made me think how best to define assimilation. Here is what I responded.
I’m not sure how to ‘define’ assimilation, but I can show it to you. Assimilation is Jose, a Cuban I sat next to on an airplane one day. Jose came to America as a 7-year-old, his brother was 9. His Father sent them when Castro took over. Jose and his brother, settled in two different American city’s never saw their Father and Mother again, they were killed by Castro’s Communists. American churches took them in, cared for them and they were eventually adopted, went to college, married, raised families and loved America. Jose told me it was hard, very hard. When his father sent him away he said, “I send you to America. They will take care of you. Make me proud.” Jose was very successful.
Assimilation is Emery. Many years ago when my wife and I were first married, we rented a duplex from Emery and his wife. They lived in one half, we the other. He had six more duplexes on his land. He ran a machine shop. He worked day and night. They were from Hungary. About a year after the communists took over they escaped through barbed wire and gunfire, together. There quest, America. He said it was hard, very hard.
Assimilation is Stan. He was from Poland. I met Stan while working with one of his sons. Stan fought with the British underground in World War II. He started fighting when he was 14 years old. His Father died in the war. At 16 Stan was severely wounded. His British contacts got him out and to Britain. In a couple of years, the war ended, but he couldn’t go home. Not then, or ever. He met an American in London who heard his story. The American got him a scholarship to Ohio State University. Stan is in his 90’s now. Very successful. He became an Executive with a large retail chain. He said, “There is nothing on earth like America.” He never saw his Mom again.
Assimilation is Kahn. Kahn is Vietnamese. I met him recently. A little younger than I am and we’re both Veterans of the Vietnam War. He served on a South Vietnamese intelligence ship, where he was the day Saigon fell. He and his shipmates immediately sailed to sea, not knowing their fate, but knowing if they returned they were dead men. Kahn was rescued by an American ship and made his way to America. Started with nothing, built a successful business, raised a family and thanks God for bringing him to America. Kahn’s twin brother, also in the Navy was captured, sentenced to prison for ten years, then re-education camp and after his release, the Communist government considered him unemployable. His Father, two years in a re-education camp, all his property and businesses confiscated and his bank accounts too. His sister, he doesn’t know what happened.
Assimilation is a community of Hmong refugees in Montana. A local high school for many years hosted a Vietnam War History Day. Vets were invited in to share their stories with the high school students. It lasted all day long. We’d assemble in the afternoon in the auditorium for Q & A and performance. Every year the Hmong children and some of their parents would come in wearing their native costumes and perform for our veterans. Why? Because of their parents and in some cases, grandparents taught them to thank America for the opportunity to live here.
I could go on and on about assimilation. I’ve been blessed to know a lady from Belgium who lost seven family members to the Nazi’s. She cherishes America. Oh, I’ll never forget Pearl. An exuberant Chinese lady, a granddaughter who Chiang Kai Shek. She was something. She started an organization of Chinese immigrants to help other Chinese immigrants to, yes. Assimilate into America. She even hosted a city street fair every year with the Mayor’s blessing, to give back to the community that welcomed them.
Yes, that my friend is assimilation. It’s made up of gratitude, hard work and a desire to be a part of something bigger than yourself and give back. On the flip side, here is what it is not. It is not coming to America and demanding your employer give you five breaks a day to pray. And by the way, I need a special room to do it in. It is not blocking traffic to allow you to line up in the street to pray. It is not sending your kids to school and demanding special food and yes, interruptions for prayer. It is not blocking off your neighborhood to police and fireman or telling young women how they must dress. And it is not coming to America and conducting yourself according to ancient laws that call for killing your daughter if she dates out of your faith. Or mutilating her with arcane practices the modern world stopped centuries ago.
Assimilation. That’s what is… and what it isn’t.
PS: When they received my response the told me I was a racist.
Ed Kugler is an Author, former Fortune 50 Executive and former Marine Scout-Sniper who served two years in the Vietnam War. He has written several books including Dead Center – A Marine Sniper’s Two Year Odyssey in the Vietnam War, Communism – The Enemy Within and most recently Firefight of the Mind.
